After you have had to deal with your teen’s anger, there is good chance that you are wondering if this is due to their age and hormones or if they are truly angry. The characteristics of a teenager make it tough to differentiate between the two, but regardless, there are ways to help you to achieve some peace in your household.
Keep the communication open
Be there when they want to talk to you. If they feel like they are unwanted or ignored, this will only ignite more anger among them. Giving them a chance to appropriately express what they are feeling will also give you the chance to show your teen how much they are loved. They may not feel comfortable at first speaking with you although your guidance with a therapist or counselor can give them the release they need with their anger.
Set healthy boundaries
Teenagers need rules that are followed with discipline and consequences when they break those rules. This is a great time to let your teen know that there is nothing wrong with feeling angry even though there are unacceptable ways to show that anger. When their anger continues to go past the agreeable mark that you set for them, you may have to take away their gaming devices or their privileges to hang out with friends to show you mean business. Stick with your bottom line so that they will have consistency with your boundaries.
Look at your example
Kids model their parent’s behavior from an early age because that is what they see from their own perspective. This does not mean that you are to blame although if you display unjustified anger it stands to reason that your teen could also be angry. By yelling and being aggressive when you are angry, you are showing them it is okay to act like that as well. There may be some changes that you can make to help them resolve their own anger. Changes with anger may take some time to regulate but being persistent and consistent with relational rules will help to mend relationships in general. Anger is definitely something that will disturb your household the longer that it is allowed to reside. Assisting your teen in changing their direction to the anger they are expressing can help them to lay the foundation they need to have a successful and peaceful life they deserve.
Stonewater Adolescent Recovery Center offers long term residential treatment programs for addiction recovery. Our programs involve the whole family for foundation building, life cleansing change.
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